This is it. Everything in my life up to this point, all the books I've read, the movies I've watched, games I've played has been leading up to this moment: saving the world. Well, okay. Not actually saving the world. But at least picking the people who save the world. That's close enough right? I mean, it's pretty much the same thing. ...Shut up. Yes it is.
Top 5 - People to Save the World!
#5 - Sarah Connor
This is the big time, and nothing less than having actually saved the world will qualify you for a spot on this list. Sarah Connor has that on her resume, although she did it a bit more indirectly than others on this list (at least in the beginning). Rather than stopping someone who was about to destroy the entire Earth, Sarah made what was more of a preemptive strike, killing the terminator before he could kill her and thereby prevent her from having the child that would eventually save the world from the rest of the machines. So why is John Connor not on this list, you ask? Simple: he's nowhere near as cool as his mom.
Sarah Connor was an ordinary 80s chick before saving the world. She had no special training, no particularly useful knowledge, just awesome 80s hair. Then, out of nowhere, some crazy Austrian robot from the future starts chasing her around LA, trying to kill her. She can't rely on nuclear weaponry or the internet to save her, and instead uses classic weapons like homemade explosives and synthesizer music. Then came Terminator 2, and Sarah was in full-blown ass-kicking mode. She earns this spot with her resourcefulness and sheer determination to not suffer an agonizing death.
#4 - Buffy Summers
A history of saving the world is a requirement for this list, but being able to negotiate the myriad of emotional troubles that come with regular teenage/young adult life will bump you up on the list. For most people, those years are spent fighting metaphorical, internalized monsters. For Buffy, her demons were literal. That's right, while most of us were complaining about acne, cafeteria food, and that one girl in math class whom you try so hard to be friendly with but get nowhere because she inevitably resorts to telling stories about how much she loves her football player boyfriend and can't wait until her parents go out of town for a weekend, Buffy was spending her nights killing actual vampires (who did not sparkle).
Sure, she got a lot of help from Giles, Willow, Xander, and all the other people who wandered into her life. Imagine what she could do when paired with Sarah Connor (and the other people on this list). Saving the world is rarely a one-person job, although the remaining people on this list try very hard to do it that way. Buffy, however, brings her witty personality and awesome combat skills and is able to share them with the group. She's proven her ability to work with others and come out victorious--definitely something you want when the entire world is at stake.
#3 - Link
Sometimes, the world is threatened by forms of dark magic and evil power that modern heroes like Sarah and Buffy don't quite have the means to combat. That's why Link's here. That, and the fact that he has a weapon known as the Master Sword--shouldn't that basically guarantee victory? Link is a silent but strong warrior with tremendous endurance, fierce fighting abilities, and a variety of musical instruments that inevitably aid him in his quests. Let's face it, if you spend enough time trying to save the world, you'll probably want someone who can cheer you up with Greensleeves.
Along with his Master Sword, Link boasts an impressive arsenal of hammers, bows, and bombs, as well as special tunics that allow him to breathe underwater, making him one of the most versatile heroes around. He'll fight at the bottom of a lake, inside a volcano, or at the top of a tower. With an awesome history of slaying monsters many times his size, Link is qualified to take down just about any beast on his own. And please, leave Navi at home--we don't need an annoying fairy with ADD shouting at us every time she notices something.
#2 - James Bond
History of saving the world? Check. Classy wardrobe? Check. Dead shot and a penchant for uttering death quips? Check and mate. Bond has saved the world more than twenty times already from some of the most villainous (and elaborate) people on this planet. He has a good history of working with allies--Kerim Bey, Jack Wade, and Felix Leiter being the most notable--and also possesses the ability to make allies out of the villains' associates. I'm not exactly sure how much of an advantage we'd gain by pulling Brigitte Neilsen to our side but, hey--you never know.
One of 007's best qualifications is that he comes equipped with everything needed to save the world. A Walther PPK, laser watch, some kind of homing device, and keys to an Aston Martin (likely with ejector seat) are on his person at nearly all times. And in this time of crisis, Q is sure to be able to whip up something special to aid him in his mission. Mr. Bond, as his enemies like to refer to him, is extremely skilled at escaping tight situations, and fighting his way through absurd amounts of henchmen. When saving the world, these traits cannot be overvalued. Oh, but please don't hit on Buffy and Sarah. Please?
#1 - Batman
When all the factors are added up, Batman emerges on top for one reason: sheer awesomeness. And that is in no way meant to detract from the others on this list--he's just that good. Like Bond, he was orphaned at a young age. Like Sarah Connor, he began as an ordinary person. Like Link, he's kind of broody. And like Buffy, he has an old guy helping him out. He's basically all of the other heroes combined.
Batman has focused his entire life around fighting crime ever since his parents were murdered, giving him a focus and determination unmatched in any hero. A knowledge of psychology helps him fight his enemies in ways that are non-physical (but have no doubt he can win both kinds of battles). He also has virtually limitless financial resources, which means he can buy the rest of us the latest iPhones and gaming consoles. Batman has fought all variety of enemies, from the mostly brawny (Bane), to the more brainy (Hugo Strange), the manimalistic (Man-Bat), and the positively deranged (you know). His very presence is terrifying, to allies and enemies alike, and with good reason. Even without superpowers, Batman can beat the life out of anyone and make it look easy. Let's put it this way: when Superman needs to scare someone into a confession, he brings that person to Batman. He has the physical, technological, and psychological weapons needed to keep us all safe from diabolical destruction. Also: Batmobile.
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