Thanksgiving Top 5

Thanksgiving is the holiday where US citizens celebrate friendship, obesity, football, and centuries-old oppression of Native Americans (see Manifest Destiny). Or something like that. Anyway, the important part of Thanksgiving is the "thanks". Well...and the "giving". I guess Thankstaking would be a completely different holiday. Aaanyway: the purpose of the holiday is for you to rack your brains thinking of something that you're thankful for. Most people go with the basics--food, family, Marisa Miller.

Some people celebrate Thanksgiving every day.

Wow, this post is one digression away from becoming a Family Guy episode. So let's--no. You know what? Let's just embrace it.



That feels better. Now (finally), what follows are a list of pop-culture-related-type-things that I'm thankful for, tailored for your enjoyment. So, y'know...enjoy.

Succeed Blog

With the popularity of Fail Blog and FML, there's a lot of negativity on the internet. Especially when you count the absurd flame wars raging in the comments section of basically any webpage. That's why I'm thankful for Succeed Blog--it provides a much-needed dose of optimism in this bleak, dreary, pessimistic world. Also, it's awesome. Highlights include: Obstacle Course Succeed, Train Dodge Succeed, Theme Song Succeed, and basically every single thing on there. But especially Monkey-on-a-Goat-on-a-Cup-on-a-Tightrope Succeed.



Jenny Lewis

Not only is she the lead singer of Rilo Kiley, who are entirely awesome in their own right, and an accomplished solo singer, Jenny Lewis has a history of being insanely awesome. It started when her first acting gig was in a Jell-O commercial. Then, deciding that was somehow minimally awesome, she starred in a 1989 movie with Fred Savage about the Nintendo World Championships that featured the short-lived Nintendo accessory the Power Glove. Only by an act of Satan is this not the highest-grossing movie of all time. But, really, all the reasons I'm thankful for Jenny Lewis can be summed up in this picture:

Marriage material.

The 80s

What? The movie with Jenny Lewis wasn't enough to convince you? For shame. How about the evolution of headbanging, with people like Ozzy Osbourne, Scorpions, Metallica, and Iron Maiden? No? How about Michael Jordan and Magic Johnson, Wayne Gretzky and Mario Lemieux, and the Jamaican bobsled team of the '88 Olympics? Still no? What about Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Batman, and Ghostbusters movies? Even that won't convince you!? Well, Stingy McNo-fun, I dare you to resist the awesomeness of Dancin' Kim!



Actors Whose Names are Reducible to Three Letters

Proof:

Joseph Gordon-Levitt (JGL)


Robert Downey Jr. (RDJ)


Neil Patrick Harris (NPH)



Actresses Whose Names are Olivia Wilde

Proof, which isn't needed but is being given anyway: She took her stage name from Oscar Wilde, one of the funniest people to have ever existed. She was in The Black Donnellys, which you probably haven't seen and is one of the biggest voids in your otherwise-enjoyable life. And she's married to an Italian prince. I'm not actually thankful for that last part, but you know you've hit other-worldly levels of awesome when you marry European royalty.

Also, this picture